it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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