Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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