Non-Jews are for practice
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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