It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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