she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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