I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
