I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I understand Curling. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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