just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
