If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Randomize
