You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Randomize
