everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize