Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
