You can't special order awesome
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Randomize
