dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Randomize
