Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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