you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
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