I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
You pole danced in your parka.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
