Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
