He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
