i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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