Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
