That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize