i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
If I die, sorry about rent.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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