can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Randomize
