My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
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its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
40s are totally the cure
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
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You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize