A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
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