If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
