It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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