Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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