Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(336): View more from North Carolina

Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.

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(801): View more from Utah

Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.

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(713): View more from Texas

Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(414): View more from Wisconsin

could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?

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(253): View more from Washington

There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.

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(219): View more from Indiana

LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS

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(443): View more from Maryland

I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning

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