Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.

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(410): the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina. http://tfl.nu/o3ng

Replies (13) Good night (2647) Bad night (627)
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(+26): View more from

Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY

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(+26): Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY http://tfl.nu/9qwj

Replies (30) Good night (7619) Bad night (2797)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy

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(405): his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy http://tfl.nu/nh11

Replies (12) Good night (3933) Bad night (1024)
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(785): View more from Kansas

Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox

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(785): Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox http://tfl.nu/t30w

Replies (38) Good night (8538) Bad night (1181)
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(206): View more from Washington

riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea

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(206): riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea http://tfl.nu/w3tl

Replies (4) Good night (1692) Bad night (1498)
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(519): View more from Ontario

Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?

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(519): Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin? http://tfl.nu/eyam

Replies (14) Good night (2985) Bad night (1075)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took

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(503): I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took http://tfl.nu/phka

Replies (6) Good night (1564) Bad night (564)
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(804): View more from Virginia

Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.

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(804): Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare. http://tfl.nu/gxnn

Replies (5) Good night (987) Bad night (479)
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(404): View more from Georgia

I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce

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(404): I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce http://tfl.nu/fuvv

Replies (8) Good night (1301) Bad night (473)
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(816): View more from Missouri

Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.

(913): View more from Kansas

Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.

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(816): Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort. (913): Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine. http://tfl.nu/1agk

Replies (1) Good night (821) Bad night (390)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore

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(715): I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore http://tfl.nu/hhtw

Replies (3) Good night (395) Bad night (552)
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(518): View more from New York

My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray

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(518): My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray http://tfl.nu/pftj

Replies (7) Good night (763) Bad night (800)
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(973): View more from New Jersey

Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.

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(973): Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration. http://tfl.nu/tyeg

Replies (0) Good night (515) Bad night (328)
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(804): View more from Virginia

Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol

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(804): Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol http://tfl.nu/jehz

Replies (2) Good night (326) Bad night (905)
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(773): View more from Illinois

No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.

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(773): No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic. http://tfl.nu/0utw

Replies (0) Good night (634) Bad night (274)

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