Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize