Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
