He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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