Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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