we have officially lost it.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
