Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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