If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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