You don't have asthma, your pregnant
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
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