are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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