and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize