mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
21 Texts That Prove All the Magic Happens in Parking Lots
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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