currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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