it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
