guys are not supposed to queef...right?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
