somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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