Already got asked if we're dating
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
