The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
