While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize