Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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