But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
