im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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